exploration of an olive grove

exploration of an olive grove, a photo by siouxzb on Flickr.

Gabrielli hiding

Gabrielli hiding, a photo by siouxzb on Flickr.

Gabbers

I thought I had updated, I am sorry.  Dr. D thinks the eye might actually be healing. She  is getting an oral dose of Baytril for 2 weeks. we are into week two now.  He said that there is capillaries starting to form in the damaged part of the eye.  He is very surprised and happy about this. I am to give him a call to update how it is going.

To me it does not look good, it is pinker as he said but with all the discharge it is gooey too! It is also not swollen any more, so it might have been a blister forming that we had seen that made it look like the eye was about to rupture. 
Now I am confused if she is going to lose the eye or not.

I will be happy if she keeps it and the ball stays viable even if she will have impaired vision.  I am also prepared for her to have the scar. 

I cried a bit the other day remembering that Spinneretta had done a colorway about Gabrielli and the focal was her eyes.  Such a pretty mint green.

Right now she is looking kind of wizardy with her whited out eye.

remembering a visualization

I was reading a thread in Catknits on Ravelry and remembered a day in Berkeley when I out of curiosity sat in on a visualization class being hosted in a library. I at first thought it all very hokey but I came away with something that has helped me.
We all were sitting there listening to the presenter as he walked us through a visualization. I will share as much as I remember.

Find your quiet place, ground yourself to it.
Place your feet firmly on the floor and see your feet slip into the ground forming roots.
 Let the roots grow firm. Feel the Earth supporting and nurturing you.
See your arms and hands reach up as a tree branches into the sky,
Let the branches reach out and cover the Earth, holding life and shelter.
When you are strong in your grounding picture a pure light surrounding you.
Now
Picture out in the vast reaches of space a vortex, or hole.
Take all that upsets you, all that has hurt you, all that makes you cry.
Bundle this all up and toss it in the hole,
Now let it all go it is no longer with you and cannot harm you any more.

This has helped me many times, the first time I started laughing as I pictured a person being stuffed in this swirling vortex and standing over them slamming them in with a huge pole as they tried to crawl out.

The presenter later said that was the first time he had laughter as a reaction. When I told him what I saw he thought my visualization a bit violent.  But for me it felt like a weight had been lifted. I was at peace and I had not even noticed how tense I had been.

if this helps anyone,  I am glad to share.



















 

A brat

                          M'Agnes really is not happy about Gabbers being in and getting special treatment.
Right now she is stalking her, sneaking up onto the shelf where Gabrielli is trying to sleep. It seems every spot in the room is M'Agnes' pursonal space and she is courting my displeasure in being a brat. She knows quite well when she has pushed me to far and scurries to the furthest place as quickly as possible to wait for me to be distracted and then comes over for cuddles.

Such a bad girl.

a video of her eye

I finally got a video up on YouTubethat was taken from my Droid...

As you can see the eye is not going to be saved.  I love her eyes so this is not a happy thing for me.

Update

Today I let Gabrielli sneak out into the backyard to enjoy the sunshine. She was being super sweet this morning and after she kneaded my cheek and shoulder, crawled under the sheets like she use to when she was a kitten. She stayed there purring for a bit until I had to get up.
It was funny watching the little quiver of excitement when she dashed past into the open following Lusitania who had opened the door for her.
Her limited site is affecting what she does and where she ventures too now.  She is not leaving the back yard or if she does she quickly returns.


I will soon be heading out to post the first wave of calendars and have sent in an order for 7 more of the Friends and Feral calendar that has Isadora on the cover.

I also want to thank every one.  I never expected this level of support.
http://houseof13cats.chipin.com/gabriellis-eye-surgery

Chip in for Gabrielli

 

Ok lets see if this works.  Gabrielli needs to have her eye removed. At this time it does not seem to be hurting her but she can no longer see from it.
I was in a mood to take pictures and saw her go into one of the many pots left about for the kitties to rest in when I saw her eye was clouded.
I did not get what might have been one awesome picture. I immediately picked her up and called the vet.
At first we thought it would be ok, a surface infection to a trauma.   She could still see and the eye looked good. it has since gotten worse.

She is a sweet little girl and now even sweeter.
I hate seeing this happen to her.

Shawl / hair pins

Long time no post.. Sorry.
I have been going crazy, I apparently do not have enough hobbies. I collect things.  I love old bottles and am always fascinated by what might be found in a rubbish pile at an old farmstead.
Yarn...can never have enough beautiful lovely wool.
Cats seem to congregate around me as if I were a magnet.
I want to learn to spin fiber into even more lovely yarn.
I garden
I throw myself into random fields of study for the sheer joy of learning
I have a small collection of beads
and now
I have taken up carving.
Carving branches into hair sticks or as some call them shawl pins.
It is therapeutic, caving out stuff and finding something beautiful left in the wood or at least I find it beautiful and really that is all that counts at the moment.
I had been watching a prune growing in the backyard. I have randomly chopped at it shaping it to a less bush more tree shape and one top branch started to grow in awkwardly. it was too thick for its natural placement so it was removed. I look at these trees as I would a bonsai.
another wannabe hobby
This branch I set aside to let dry and had a fight to keep people from tossing it out in the garden refuse. This time I left the  skin on the wood.  I took the leaves and made a tea from them to dye some wool. This was the wool I had mordanted in the copper solution.
Just a few days ago I was took a piece off and started to whittle it with a small knife. I am using this as a learning situation.  I once read somewhere that to learn to carve get a log and sit down with a knife. To learn how to use the knife turn the log to tiny bits of shavings. By the time you have finished shaving the log to nothing you should have learned what you need to know.
I am loving the prunus wood and attempting a gratefruit branch. 
Did you now that when you wet citrus wood it turns green?
I do not have good news about Gabrielli, it seems the eye will need removal. So now I need to find out how to work chip in. The estimate is from $687 to $817.  She is now getting 2 different eye thingss a drop 4x a day and an ointment 3x a day.
I still need a root canal but I can wait on that. Gabrielli does not seem in pain but she is now scanning and even though she wants outside she stops at the door. i think she is starting to realise that outside is not a good thing anymore.
To help fund this I am selling calendars and the hair/shawl pins I carve.

Does it ever end?


 

Gabrielli update

It is now a week since she has seen Dr. D.
She is getting ointment in her eye and is very frustrated at being kept inside.

Dr. D was very hopeful that the eye will heal. It has suffered trauma from either a thorn or a fight with one of the other cat. possible both. He said that veins were growing into the mass on her cornea but that he could not see if there was any scarring.

She has put some weight back on and is getting spunky again. She is trying to race the door when I let one of the others in or out.  The others in the house have been told to let NO ONE out of my room. If they go in they are trapped until I get home.  This is because I am the only one that seems to be able to tell the difference in which cat is who.

Just a few more weeks of eye goo and a recheck in 8 more days to monitor how she is healing. I did remind Dr. D that she responds best to sulfate and it seems that the eye cream is a sulfate one.

Now if I can just get the funds together to take care of my own medical needs.......

on to the rest of the cats ..... tomorrow = day off and I will be taking M'Agnes to the beach for a photo shoot.  I really need to work on her next calendar.  I will also make a calendar of the crew even if it is only for me.

Cheers

I really want to scream.  I called the vets office to ask what I could do with Gabrielli until I got paid and got the expected of just keep it clean until we can see it. yadda yadda
So I place her in a cage while I went to work.

I get home and she is not in the cage. The cage is still closed but there is an area by the door where she could have forced her way out.  Yes insert scream here.  I ask and was told that my mom went into the room to get the bird that had also been in the room and as she turned around she saw a grey tail dancing down the hall.

I can only hope I DO catch her again to see the vet.

Oh Gabbers WHY do you do this??

Gabrielli

Today Gabrielli came home with a clouded eye. 
She has been just on the perimeter of the yard lately so I have not had much contact with her. She likes to stay just out of reach . I caught her as she curled up in an empty planter to nap. Since I was taking pictures for the next calendar, I was about to nab a shot until I noticed her eye.

So no pictures, but I do have her in my back room where she can rest in peace and not be tormented by the others.
I do not know what happened, was she in a fight? did she get caught by a rose thorn?
Why do they have to get hurt when I have n money and need a root canal myself???
So now I get to worry and hope that keeping the eye flushed will help until I can get her to the vet.
I really need to find her another home. She is not dealing well with the younger ferals that have shown up.
I hope she does not lose the eye, but until I can get her to the veterinarian I need to not scare myself.
She is one of my special needs kitties. She cannot have rabies vacc. as it will kill her, she does not respond to antibiotics.

She makes me want to cry.  Sometimes I think it would be kinder to just have her PTS but maybe if I could find her another home she would be better than she is here. She is good with people once she knows them, just not cats.
I really hope it is something simple.

a memory

The other day I was reliving a memory.
I was around 7 and the family was exploring SF Chinatown. I can remember my father constantly saying to not touch anything so I was standing there hands behind my back looking at a display of fans.

I remember an elderly lady coming up to me and very gently asking me if I wanted to know the proper way to open and close one of them. She lightly place the tip of her finger on the top and with the thumb of her other hand she slid it open.

I still love fans.

Yes I have been quiet and I am having problems getting rid of this donate link that seems to go nowhere.
I wish it did work as it would go directly to vet expenses.

The kitties are doing good, I am still scrouging to get Robber his base line for potential kidney issues. Dr.D think one is non functioning as it is 1/3 of the other.

 

I am glad she no longer fits thru the door.

M'Agnes seems to be maturing. She still tries to get out the front to visit with her boyfriend but now stops to make sure of cars.  I was surprised when I saw her go to the street and look both ways befor she sarted to venture across to where I was talking with my neighbor. She will be 2 in one more week so I need to get her a present and Lu also has her birthday this month. She will be 6! where did the time go?

I really need to start working on next years calendars. i have set myself to 2 different ones this time one for M'Agnes fans and the other for my former ferals.

 Need to fund their food and vetting somehow.

I have given up ever seeing Mikael or Lakota they have been gone to long now

 and I really do not trust some of the people in my area.

I have been dealing with a lot of exhaustion lately and finally caved. I called out sick and spent 48 hours sleeping. I now just took a tramadol in hopes that my arm and hip will relax.
What have I been doing. I have been knitting only a little, I have ideas flying about bot not the abition to get them done. I have been watching Once Upon A time and Grimm. It has been years since I have wanted to watch and follow a TV show. 

I have a sad too, I had ordered some boots from DUOBOOTS and I Loved them but one problem the zip in the left boot folded in onitself right above the ankle. So I had to return the Bonn, I had hoped that it would be a fixable thing but just found out that it is not so I will be getting a different pair Birch I hope these work out better I would hate to have to send them back as well.

Snap of calendar

Snap of calendar, a photo by siouxzb on Flickr.

Snap of calendar

Cherry Blossoms and Tea

Happy February

Today M'Agnes was helping us prune.

She was very helpful and made sure all the cut branches stayed on the ground.

I think she had more fun with the citrus than the prunus as there was more branches and leaves to swat into submission.

She looked very beautiful with the cherry blossoms all around, 

I would have liked it better if I could have gotten a better picture of her in them.

It really is to early for this to be blooming. It is the only one so no fruit this year I hope the other trees bloom more together so I might get at least a little fruit from the trees.

I did finally use my 'new' tea cup.

this cup is wonderful and has its own tea strainer and lid!

I christened it with rose tea.

The real question is "What are my tea leaves trying to tell me?" 

Is that a cat?

Is that a bat?

What does a cat and bat have to tell me?

Or

Is this a very fat tree?

The other day I was at half price books and found a small treasure.  It was an Andre Norton book that I had never read.  The book is Cats eye. It was published in '62.  I am pretty sure it predates Beast Master as it seem to be toying with the idea of a mental communication between animal and human.  I am so very very sad that Andre Norton has passed on I wish I had gotten to meet her.  At least now with her estate settled her books can now be republished.

I know some people think her stories are to sketchy but really think about the time she lived in and how many she rolled out. Science fiction and fantasy takes on history. She created whole worlds to be explored.  She made me question the run of time. I no longer accept linear time and have not for quite some time.  It is splintered, it circles on itself. Time is irrelevant.

As I was reading this book that is older than me, that on its front cover says for young and old readers, has inside it an advertisement.

 A very shocking one for this generation.

Inside this book for Young and old readers is a pull out ad for Kent Cigarettes.